fully alive

Life beckons with promises of failure and uncertainty, and yet to be a man fully alive, which is the glory of God, is the strongest call on my life. He who loses his life saves it Christ says, and I can’t imagine saving it here for the ‘pleasures’ of this life. One has to wonder what pleasure should really mean since man is not good, and life not fair, and suffering and pain the norm. Why then do we have pleasure? We needn’t have taste buds to eat, or to enjoy sex to reproduce. But they are good gifts from the Father. So then is our pain, which reminds us that we’re alive, and that this world is not all there is. And, if we hold anything to be true, it should be that the world should be much worse, as it holds the likes of you and I, broken people in desperate need of grace. And yet in this paradox of pleasure and pain I find myself longing to taste the freedom on being truly alive, and have that be God’s glory. This young, yet worn man, much prefers a simpler life to the distraction and abundance found here. The fondest memories I hold are not of things I’d consider fun, but of things I consider beautiful. Holding a small fatherless child in the biting, frigid wind. Praying with a dying woman in her small house. Sharing God’s word with people who have little hope. These are what have defined me, yet defied explanation, as is obvious by my relative silence about them. Yes, I have beheld amazing beauty; from the islands of Hong Kong to the hills of Uganda to the mountains of Hawaii I’ve seen it. Nothing compares to the profound beauty of love, the mastery of which I’ve yet to fathom. I’ve known love in its many forms at various times in my short love, and it defines me, and drives me to a place of pursuing it harder. I’ve received love as well, and for that I am grateful and blessed. True life beckons…. promising what could never be grasped apart from Christ, grace, love, truth, freedom, and hope. Lord, Make me fully alive.